Are You Meeting Hubby’s Needs?

Worry can be a relationship killer. In her newest book, Partly Cloudy with Scattered Worries, women’s conference speaker Kathy Collard Miller encourages women to trust God more and worry less. This is especially important in regard to marriage.

“Worry often steals the joy from our marriages,” Kathy says, “especially when we’re not sure we’re meeting the needs of our husband.”

Kathy’s right! I’ve seen worry cause women to react negatively toward their husbands as they misinterpret their husband’s reactions. When we know men’s needs, we can ask God to help us respond in wisdom.

Kathy continues…

In our marriages, there are three things men need.

(1) Your husband needs a helpmeet (Genesis 2:18).

Like a suit made for a man, God choose you specifically for your husband to complement and complete him. And for him to complement and complete you. You both fit together in ways that will challenge you to recognize your weak spots and trust God more.

You can upgrade your marriage by appreciating the ways your husband is different. His different opinions and methods are God’s gift for you to learn and grow. Casting away that opportunity is like telling God He doesn’t know what He’s doing.

(2) Your husband needs a lover (I Corinthians 7:3-4).

God designed sexual union to bless both of you. It’s His gift of physical pleasure to bond two people together.

You can upgrade your marriage by making sexual intimacy a priority. Read books that teach a Christian view of sex and plan time for it.

Your most important sexual organ is your brain. Preparing for intimacy with positive thoughts will prepare you for your husband’s attention. I often think as I get in our bed ready for sex, “The playground is open.”

(3) Your husband needs a respecter (Ephesians 5:33).

It’s interesting that the Bible never tells a wife to love her husband, but it does say to respect him. Respect lets your husband know he is significant and valued.

You can upgrade your marriage by considering your husband’s opinion important even as you calmly give an opposing viewpoint.

Omit disrespectful choices like nagging, contempt, anger, comparisons, manipulating, and gossiping about him.

As you think of those three insights and the three upgrades, which upgrade do you want to work on?

Kathy Collard Miller has spoken in 30 states and seven foreign countries, and has 49 published books including Partly Cloudy with Scattered Worries. Kathy, a mom and grandma, lives in Southern California with her husband, Larry, and they often speak at marriage events and retreats. You can read more from Kathy at her blog.

Image in Text courtesy of stockimages / FreeDigitalPhotos.net.