When the Ache Won’t Go Away

With the wisdom of a story-telling sage, Cynthia Ruchti leads women to the Source of grace and hope:

“Like an abscessed tooth, the memory of Darren’s betrayal kept Marika from chewing on that side of life,” Ruchti said. “The pain throbbed through her entire being. She thought she was doing fine until she’d chomp down on something hard—like her daughter’s fatherless recital—and restart the cycle of pain.”

Her words are more than one woman’s story. It’s a lesson to help us UPGRADE our attitudes as we deal with life’s hurts.

Ruchti continues …

I pray you don’t identify with Marika’s stabbing distress. But I know better than to assume you don’t. Or that you don’t care about someone walking her path.

We’ve heard the stories too often—the husband who walks away from his family, who chooses to ignore his responsibilities and his marriage vows in favor of the adventure of someone who comes packaged with no responsibilities but a good time, someone who treats him like a pubescent boy rather than the man he’s supposed to be.

He gets a condo in the city. The Marikas in the story are stuck with an impossible mortgage, the full weight of raising their children, an awkward or no social life, leaky gutters, a mini-van with an ailing transmission, and an abscess-like sense of rejection.

Or the situation is flipped, an all-too frequent occurrence. She and her girlfriend decide to leave their husbands and kids and share a condo in the city, a place that allows them a freedom that comes at the cost of their marriages and their children’s happiness.

Referring to fractured families like Marika’s, a quote from Ragged Hope: Surviving the Fallout of Other People’s Choices says,

“The spittle of parental hostility always lands on the children. A feud between Mom and Dad is as hard to breathe through as secondhand smoke.”

As a gossamer, balm-laced overlay to that picture, though, is this unshakable truth that cuts through the pain:

God doesn’t just care; He understands.

We lean on His power, His ability to hold us, His tenacious love for us, no matter which part of the abscess equation is ours. But this too is true—His understanding has no limit.

His love is limitless. His forgiveness is limitless. His compassion knows no bounds. His mercy is limitless. We cling to those promises. But here’s a holding-on place for trying times that gets less attention than others. The Bible assures us there is no limit to His understanding (Psalm 147:5).

He understands how deeply betrayal cuts. He understands our insomnia, our frustration, our weariness, our battle to keep from letting bitterness dictate our reactions. He understands it all.

          He doesn’t just know. He understands.

          He doesn’t just see. He sees why.

          He doesn’t just react. He creates.

          He doesn’t just care. He shows it.

          He doesn’t just love us through it. He gets it.

He understands exactly how fast our world is spinning and how close it’s tiptoeing to the edge.

He understands how ragged and worn we sometimes feel.

          He understands it all. All.

Fill your lungs with that bracing breath of life today. No matter what we face, Someone understands.

Now, there’s something to hold onto while we wait for the pain to subside!

When has God’s understanding encouraged you to hang on and persevere?

Cynthia Ruchti is the author of Ragged Hope: Surviving the Fallout of Other People’s Choices, a book that takes a look at the realities of the consequences we face because of another’s wrong, hurtful, misguided, or sinful decisions. Filled with stories of those who responded admirably and with uncommon grace, the book also addresses those of us who walk beside people caught in the aftermath of someone else’s bad decision. You can connect with Cynthia on her website or Facebook Reader Page to find out more about this book and others she’s written.